A Continuation of Reflections

Hi John how I miss you- I have been unbearable sad since Philip left-a combination of missing him and missing you--too much- I have felt overwhelmed with sadness and loss. I spoke to Philip the other day and he was having a sad day too- seeing all your things- and he has so many memories of being there with us for such a long time he was struggling too- but he kept busy both he and Phil have worked towards leaving castlenel the was I like it- I usually do the spring cleaning when I get there-- but I am not going for long- so I don't want to face- hard cleaning and yet more clearing of the SPTDV and paying Frank too take all the junk put there over the winter to the eco park. Philip misses you so much- we all do. Your gentle presence in our lives. I had a nice message from Mary Mc Dermott ( a blast from the past in Ennis) she said a lot of nice things about us and our influence on her life and how we helped when her brother died- it is so touching that we are held so dear- b...

Dearest John I miss you so much today and wish you were here to talk about our last few weeks with Philip and his departure yesterday. I was not prepared for how sad I would feel. I knew I would feel sad-- but I cried all the way home on the bus from the airport last night--so much so I did not go to the cinema as planned- I had wine and chocolate for supper as it was comforting- two glasses of wine and two chocolate bars--- it stemmed the sadness. Happily I did not cry with Philip he went off seeing me happily waving to him- although we both knew we both felt anxious...we had a lovley day but there was a build up of tension in the back ground- for me at least. After my morning writing and Philip's morning doing stuff on his ipad- we had tea in the garden and it was hot and sunny blissful- we talked about how we felt- I was a bit tearful-but he was still here so it was OK. The he did his final packing putting asdie things for me to take to Spain and things to stay in the cell...

Hello my lovely husband-- Philip has just left to have some food with his friend Tony- tonight is his last night here at Ullet Road- Andrew and Lucy will come in for a last farewell and his friend Si too. I was expecting Penny and Johnny on Wednesday but once again they have had to postpone- Lara will be back in Cambridge for one day only- Wednesday! it is fine- but I do miss them I got so used to spending a lot of time with them especially Johnny at the end of last year. It is strange not to have seen him since January -he seems genuinely sad not to be coming and says he misses me a lot which is touching-- poor lambs have just gone through their mum's first anniversary. Andrew Lucy Sophie Nick little Lola and I went on the Ferry on Saturday it was a beautiful day- and everyone enjoyed it-- me too but it was very poignant for me- thinking of our wedding day-such joy- and your 80th birthday trip too- and many of our wedding anniversaries on the ferry. I miss you John- I wish...

  Nos sentamos, nos miramos, nos cogemos las manos, pasa el tiempo. We sit down, we look at each other, we take each other by the hand, time passes Made me think of my relationship with you dearest John. Hello my love I have been so focused on Philip's departure. I have not written here- but of course I think of you every day and look at your photo. Last weekend Philip came here after weeks of leaving do-s -packing- sorting all kind of things out- sending his possessions to Spain- Oxfam- mustard seed- and here. I felt a bit overwhelmed by all the stuff he brought- finally we have most of it in the cellar- some things in the house- I got a new sofa bed from IKEA and the boys put it together for me- it has three drawers in it- and his kilt is in one of them - I can't put it in the cellar. Over time I will sort out the stuff in the cellar-a lot of kitchen stuff- but I don't think I will use it I have little enough space as it is. It was dads 87th birthday on 15t...